Maddy the Magnificent

"LADIES AND GENTLEMEN!" Maddy stood in the living room wearing Dad's old cape and a top hat made from cardboard. The whole family was squished on the couch. Brother Jake. Mom. Dad. Grandma. Even Biscuit the dog. "Prepare to be AMAZED!" said Maddy. She waved her wand. It was a wooden spoon with a star taped on the end. Jake yawned. --- "For my FIRST trick," said Maddy, "I will make something DISAPPEAR!" She put a tea towel over Jake's juice box. "ABRA... KADABRA... PRESTO!" She whipped the tea towel away. The juice box was still there. But it was empty. Jake picked it up. Shook it. Nothing. "...Did you just drink my juice?" "The JUICE has vanished!" said Maddy. "Thank you, thank you!" "That's not magic. You drank it. I can see the straw mark on your—" "MOVING ON!" Mom clapped. Dad clapped. Jake did not clap. "For my NEXT trick," said Maddy, "I need a VOLUNTEER!" Grandma smiled. "Oh, pick me, love!" "Grandma! Lovely. Now, I'm going to make this coin DISAPPEAR from your hand." She put a coin in Grandma's palm and covered it with the tea towel. "ABRA... KADOOBRA... ZAMI!" She whipped the tea towel away. The coin was still there. But Grandma's teeth were gone. Grandma felt her mouth. "My TEEF! Where are my TEEF?!" Everyone looked around. Then they heard it. Click. Click. Click. Biscuit was sitting in the corner. Grinning. With a full set of dentures. CLICK CLICK CLICK went the teeth in Biscuit's mouth. "AAAAAGH!" screamed Jake. "BISCUIT!" shouted Mom. Biscuit wagged his tail. CLICK CLICK CLICK. He looked VERY pleased with himself. Dad got the teeth back. Eventually. Grandma popped them in and wiggled her jaw. "Not bad, Maddy," she said. "Not bad at all." "For my FINAL trick," said Maddy, "I need EVERYONE to move to the dinner table." Mom looked nervous. "Maddy, maybe we should—" "PLEASE. HOLD. YOUR. APPLAUSE." The family sat around the table. It was set for dinner. Plates. Cups. A big bowl of salad. A jug of juice. A chocolate cake right in the middle. "I will now pull this tablecloth OFF the table," said Maddy. "And EVERYTHING on top will stay PERFECTLY still." Dad whispered to Mom, "Should we stop her?" "Too late," said Mom. Maddy grabbed the edge of the tablecloth. She took a deep breath. "ABRA... KADOOBRA... MAGNIFICO!" She PULLED. The tablecloth did not come off cleanly. The tablecloth did not come off cleanly AT ALL. CRASH! The salad bowl flipped onto Dad's head. SPLASH! The jug of juice went all over Mom. BONK! A plate spun off the table and landed on Jake's lap. SPLAT! The chocolate cake flew through the air in slow motion. Everyone watched it. Up. Up. Up. And right onto Grandma's face. SPLOOSH. The room went very quiet. Grandma wiped chocolate from her eyes. Everyone held their breath. Then Grandma licked her lips. "...That's a good cake." The whole room EXPLODED with laughter. Mom was dripping with juice. Dad had lettuce in his ears. Jake had crumbs all over his lap. Biscuit was licking cake off the floor. And Grandma had chocolate all over her face and didn't care one bit. Maddy took a big bow. "THANK YOU! I am Maddy the Magnificent! Shows every Saturday!" Jake wiped his face. "Please no." Maddy grinned. Same time next week. THE END.